Cowboy Hats and Whataburger: Part II

So what do i like about Texas? Well, though they do lack Wawa's (if you're from or have ever spent a considerable amount of time in Philly you know and love Wawa), on the other hand I can buy beer from grocery stores here due to the fact that they don't have the stupid alcohol laws present in Pennsylvania. I love Pennsylvania, but the liquor laws there are retarded. You can only buy alcohol from state laws and no beer in grocery stores or gas stations. Of course, that means both beer and alcohol are also more expensive there. Sure the state gets money, but the citizens get screwed the fuck over. In Texas? I can get a six-pack of Blue Moon for $7.50. Slap your grandma!
My other new favorite thing about Texas is Whataburger. It's the Texas answer to Cali's In-N-Out. Whataburger, though, also serves breakfast and is open 24 hours a day. Plus the burgers are big and delicious. Bad for you? Hell yeah. But if you'e worried about your health you shouldn't be eating at a fast food joint. And for an extra 59 cents you can add jalapenos to any burger. Good deal. It's still not Pat's, but not too shabby. I foresee many drunken nights ending in a trip to Whataburger. My only complaint thus far is of their new BBQ Chicken sandwich. I mean, the chicken was good, but it just really had too much BBQ sauce. Otherwise, pretty damn good. Now if only they can get me some Yuengling down here...

Cowboy Hats and Whataburger: Part I

Time won't change you
Money won't change you
I haven't got the faintest idea
Everything seems to be up in the air at this time

I need something you change your mind

Drugs won't change you
Religion won't change you

Science won't change you
Looks like I can't change you
I try to talk to you, to make things clear
but you're not even listening to me...
And it comes directly from my heart to you...

I need something to change your mind
Talking Heads - "Mind"

So after five days in Texas I've found that there are certain things here that I like a certain things that piss me off. Let's start with the things that I hate. Those stupid cowboy hats. Yeah, the ones you see in any stereotypical depiction of a Texan, yup they're for real. And they're probably the stupidest this I have ever seen. There's no reason to wear them other than to boldly claim "look at me, I'm a giant redneck!" Look, maybe these ginormous hats made sense 100 years ago when people would walk around in the blaring sun all day, but it makes no sense for someone to be wearing them in the suburbs of Houston in the 21st century!! You're not a fucking cowboy and you never will be!! Give it up. You look fricking ridiculous.
Then there's the Texas accents. I'm one of those people that notices the way people talk. I love a slight British accent in girls. Just sooo sexy. Condescending, yes... but also sexy. Boston accents amuse me. Southern accents just make me smile. But then we get to Indian accents. Like those thick straight-off-the-boat accents. I HATE them. Seriously. They make me nauseous. And you put it on a girl and she instantly sounds 60 years old. Well, put the Texas accent alongside the Indian one. I detest it. I don't really know why, there's just something about it that rubs me the wrong way. Just too "texan" or something. If I ever start talking with a Texan accent, please shoot me. And fantastic that I have to listen to this atrocious excuse for a noise every day now. You know what, maybe just go ahead and shoot me now. Tomorrow.... what I actually like about Texas!

Initial Thoughts on Texas

i feel a hot wind on my shoulder / and the touch of a world that is older
I turn the switch and check the number / I leave it on when in bed i
slumber
I hear the rhythms of the music / I buy the product and never use it
I hear the talking of the dj / can't understand--just what does he say?

i'm on a mexican radio / i'm on a mexican radio

I dial it in and tune the station / they talk about the u.s. inflation
I understand just a little / no comprende--it's a riddle

i'm on a mexican radio / i'm on a mexican radio

I wish I was in tiajuana / eating barbecued iguana
i'd take requests on the telephone / i'm on a wavelength far from home
I feel a hot wind on my shoulder / I dial it in from south of the border
I hear the talking of the dj / cant understand--just what does he say?
Wall of Voodoo - "Mexcian Radio"

Soooo I moved to Texas. Houston to be specific. Growing up on the east coast there's always been that bias against Texas (which hasn't been helped any by our oh-so-lovely current president). The prevailing thought is that they're either ignorant, racist, trigger-happy, anti-environmental or soem mix of all of the above. Well, I've been here for less than a day so far, but my first impression is that people here seem to be genial and helpful. It pains me to say this, but perhaps nicer than people in Philly. Now anyone who knows me knows that I love Philly. It has been my home for 22 plus years and I will support and defend my city to the death. Despite the fatness, the constant losing sports teams, the racist police force (well, at least in the past at any rate) and our overall Napoleon complex at always being ignored in favor of New York, Boston and DC, I still love Philly. Always will. But sometimes, you go to a restaurant or bar or some public place in Philly, and the people are just plain old rude, apathetic and just not endearing at all. I don't deal well with that shit. I've had a retail job before, and yeah, it sucks hardcore. But you know what, it's a paycheck. You suck it up, you be nice to customers and you do your fucking job. Too many times at various places in Philly I've just received terrible service, and honestly it hurts me that this is the impression people are getting of my city. Well, hopefully people in Houston tend to act decently. It still won't make up for the lack of cheesesteaks in the city... but maybe I can get used to Tex-Mex.

This is Ourrrr Country

Don't want no cash
Don't need no money
Ain't got no stash
This note's for you.

Ain't singin' for Pepsi
Ain't singin' for Coke
I don't sing for nobody
Makes me look like a joke
This note's for you.

Ain't singin' for Miller
Don't sing for Bud
I won't sing for politicians
Ain't singin' for Spuds
This note's for you.

Don't need no cash
Don't want no money
Ain't got no stash
This note's for you.

Neil Young - This Note's For You

So by now everyone's heard that damned John Mellencamp song and seen the fucking commercial at least once. And if you watch football, you probaly see it at least ten times per game. If you haven't seen it or for some reason want to torture yourself, here it is again:


I have several problems with this commercial.

1) The Complete Selling Out of John Mellencamp
I like Mellencamp, I really do. Has a lot of really good, hard-hitting socially conscious songs. In the 80s, him and Springsteen wrote songs for the common man and helped to keep rock and roll alive in a landscape that was increasingly being taken over the hedonism of disco and the stage theatrics of hair metal. You gotta give the man some respect for that. He jsut made some real good songs. But now he's selling his soul to a corporaton to make a few bucks? That's bullshit and a slap in the face of every one of his fans. Have some integrity man. I'm sure you can't possibly need money that badly. And sure, many artists have had their music used in commercials, (The Who in all those Nissan commercials, AC/DC for Black and Decker, U2 doing IPOD, and The Clash in Jaguar commercials) but Mellencamp is the first big time rocker I can think of that is directly marketing a new release with a nationally televised commercial created solely to be played over a song of that new album. The man who used to speak up for farmers and the little man is now using the very corporations that stifle the common man, for whom he purportedly speaks, to sell his wares. What a sham. No, he's not the first artist to sell-out, (anyone remember what Metallica or No Doubt used to sound like?) nor will he be the last, but it's the way the ad is done that irks me. Which brings us to point number two...

2) The Perversive Nature of the Commercial
The entire point of the Chevy commercial is, bluntly put, to tell you that if you're a real American you will buy a Chevy product. This is done by playing Mellencamp's ode-to-America against various images of our country. This is where I am insulted. A picture is shown of Martin Luther King, Jr. Seriously, what does a civil rights leader have to do with selling a car? King's surviving relatives should be angry that his image is being used by Chevy of all people. Another scene in the commercial shows the flooded destruction caused by hurricane Katrina. Using the images of a natural disaster that killed thousands and affected thousands more is a despicable act. Hopefully this advertising campaign fails miseraby. Chevy intends to feed on the base patriotism of Americans to sell cars. Maybe if they concentrated more on making better vehicles and less on not-so-subtle manipulation, Chevy sales would go up. In the meantime, I'm gonna go drive my Corolla while I blast some good old British rock and roll. Maybe some Zeppelin. Oh wait, that just wouldn't feel right if I wasn't in a Cadillac...

Honkeydonk Badonkadonk

go get me a kid
with a good-looking face
bring me a kid
can remember his place
some hungry poet
son of a bitch
he gets to be famous I get to be rich

or bring me a girl
they're always the best
you put 'em on stage
and you have 'em undress
some angel whore
who can learn a guitar lick
hey, that's what I call music
- "Joe" by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

Music has officially hit a new low. If you haven't heard "Honkeytonk Badonkadonk" and seen the uber-ridiculous video, you need to check it out.



I mean seriously, what the hell is this? It's a country rap video for crying out loud!! I laughed my ass off. And sadly, this heaping pile of elephant shit will likely get heavy rotational play. What's happened to music? I'm a music fanatic (read: elitist music nerd) so awful shit like this offends me to the core. Music used to mean something. It truly has the power to be a catalyst for change or to give a voice to the disenfranchied. And music doesn't have to be socailly or politically charged to be relevant. Well written lyrics and musicianship are all you really need to ceate a good song. Sadly, most popular songs lack any substance whatsoever. Just listen to the lyrics of Honkeytonk Badonkadonk. C'mon, "and now it's on like donkey kong"? Was this written by a five year old?? And for some reason beyond my understanding people continue to listen to and promote the creation of this stuff. Just take a look at some of the other shit that's been put out there:





And there's thousands of other songs equally as bad out there. That anyone would be made to listen to this crap is cruel and unusual punishment. I could let retarded monkeys loose in my shed and they'd come up with better music than this. Sad this is what has become of 'popular' music. John Lennon must be throwing-up in his grave. Eh, maybe I shouldn't be complaining. I'm sure the next time I'm drinking and the Pussycat Dolls come on, I'll start with the "suck my beep..." comments before the song's ten seconds old. And we know that's always fun.

I'm here

Hola

So I've joined the blog-o-sphere. I don't really know why. Just kinda bored I guess. A little about me: I'm 22, born in Philly, raised in the suburbs. I'm passionate about music, sports, books and animals. As a whole, I think society's fucked up. I have no faith in the overall goodness and benevolence of humanity. I see people as morally corrupt and intelectually apathetic. I do, however, believe that individual people are capable of rising above the masses and bringing good into an otherwise dark world. Though the flock may be sour I cannot condemn every being that resides within it. Some may call me pessimistic. I disagree. I think I'm more of a realist. Ultimately, people unnecessarily suffer on a daily basis and bad shit happens to good people. Sutff does NOT always happen for the better. And what hurts you will not necessarily make you stronger. Life's fucked up. That's the way it always has been and always will be. Shit happens, you experience it, you learn from it, and you move on. Some of it's good, some of it's bad. That's life. I plan to post my musings on life, society, and pretty much anything that manages to occupy my mind. Peace... and happy new year.