March Madness!!

Okay, I've been slacking. And obviously I'm a little late with my Madness thoughts. But better late than never, right?
So I had USC in my Championship game. Now this may seem to foolish to many of you, but everyone (well at least Michael Wilbon and Bill Simmons) was raving about the progress of OJ Mayo. So I jumped on the Trojan bandwagon. Imagine my utter joy when I come back from work to see that USC is down by ten with 2 minutes to go. Awesome. There were two lessons to be learned from this devastating defeat:
1) NEVER, under any circumstances, bet on someone named OJ. Seriously, what was I thinking??
Which brings me to point number 2) I fucking suck at picking an NCAA bracket. My cinderellas always fail and my favorites always falter. If you ever want to win a bracket, just pick the opposite of me. It's just fate at this point. I am destined to never win a god-damned NCAA pool. The only thing I'm proud of is that I had Nova making it this far.
Well I have UCLA winning it all, so if you're a Bruins fan, let me just apologize in advance.

Screw you ESPN.com. You couldn't have posted this story before I picked St. Mary's to beat Texas? Thanks for nothing, fuckers.

Someone's gonna get a real good player in Stephon Curry. I hope he stays in school; it's players like him that make the tournament fun to watch. Also, maybe he'll hit puberty by draft time next year.

Seriously USC, you lost to Kansas fucking State. C'mon! That's where kids that don't get into Kansas go to school! Granted, they did somehow end up with Michael Beasley and Bill Walker... so I guess they know how to recruit right?

Without further ado, here's my sweet sixteen picks:

1 - UNC over 4 - Washington State : UNC's just talented, too athletic

3 - Louisville over 2 - Tennessee : Seeing as I had Tennessee losing to Butler in the last round (which almost happened!) no way I can go with the Voluneers here. Plus, Lofton's hurt

12 - Villanova over 1 - Kansas : Okay, so in my bracket I have Kansas beating the 'Cats... but to hell with that. Go big or go home. Nova's peaking at the right time and Kansas always seems to fold sometime. Why not against a confident, well-coached Villanova team?

10 - Davidson over 3 - Wisconsin : So originally I had USC beating Georgetown in this spot. Ha! Davidson's hot and Curry's playing out of his mind. They beat Georgetown. Are Wisconsin better than the Hoyas? I don't think so. Though this means either a 10 or 12 seed in the final four, I'm going with it.

1 - Memphis over 5 - Michigan State : Just like to point out that I called this game beforehand. As much as I like Drew Neitzel and Tom Izzo, it's hard to go against an immensely talented Memphis team.. at least for now.

2 - Texas over 3 - Stanford : Sooo my prediction of Marquette vs. St. Mary's didn't actually pan out. So I visited Sanford's campus a few weeks ago. And all I can say is FUCK THE CARDINALS! Not only do you get ivy league level education while having actual competitive sports teams, but our damn campus is absolutely gorgeous. Bullshit. Total bullshit. Going with Texas on pure emotion here.

1 - UCLA over 12 - Western Kentucky : UCLA might've struggled their last game, but please... they're not losing to Western Kentucky. UCLA in a rout

3- Xavier over 7 - West Virginia : I originally had Xavier beating Duke here. I don't see them not being able to handle the Mountaineers.

And there you have it. The answer key. Just for you
(Again, UCLA fans, I'm so very sorry...)