I'm addicted to football

please tell me why
The car is in the front yard and I'm
sleeping with my clothes on
came in through the window last night
and you're gone
It's no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy
cause every now and then I kick the living shit out of me
a smoke alarm is going off and there's a cigarette
still burning

Lit - My Own Worst Enemy

So it's football season, and of course I'm excited as balls. But I have to ask myself: why? Football season ensures that I will be anxious and nervous until the super bowl. My moods on Mondays (and next Tuesday) will be determined by the previous day's Eagles game. We had one of the worst losses EVER yesterday, and I've been in a foul mood all day (probably didn't help that my computer's being a little cunt today). Honestly, how do we lose that game? Favre played like the 85-year-old he is. Our defense was dominant. Green Bay's offense did precisely shit. Yet our offense was anemic, McNabb was not his best, and the play calling was suspect at best. Despite all that, we lost because of two (fucking two!) fumbled punts. Never have I seen that in my life. And I just happened to be sitting between Packer fans at the bar. Just perfect.
One day football will undoubtedly kill me. I do not doubt this. When the Eagles lose, I'm crushed. When they win, I don't feel elation, but rather relief. And yet I can't walk away from the games. It's like fuckin heroin. I crave it, even though I know it's bad for me. I mean c'mon, it's not like I'm cheering for the Colts or the Pats. As much as I love the Eagles, they're gonna need a hell of a season to reach the super bowl, let alone win the damn thing. In my lifetime, they've won precisely zero titles. So I'd have to be insane to still cheer for them, right? Insane to give them everything I have emotionally and mentally for the next four months. And yet it's not even a question if I'll continue to root for the birds. Of course I fucking will. Is it smart? Rational? Sensible? To devote that much to one cause where the odds point to you being disappointed?? It's nuts! But yet, I'm no where near alone. As much as I live and die with the Eagles, I'd be hard-pressed to say that I'm their biggest fan. I'm sure there's some people out there more hardcore than me. And I feel for them, I really do. We all need serious help. It's like walking across a set of railroad tracks knowing that you're gonna get creamed by a freight train. I feel like Nancy Kerrigan, all I want to know is: why??